How we decided to adopt a baby

I realize that I should have made this one of my first posts but better late than never. Many people ask us how we decided to adopt a baby. The answer is not simple but here it goes. Dave and I got married 10/10/98. One year later I went off the pill and tried to get pregnant. I found out Easter 2000 that I was pregnant. A couple weeks later we found out I was carrying twins. At that moment and for almost 3 years later we thought that our family was complete.

As the boys approached their third birthday I realized I wanted another baby. Dave on the other hand did not. We went on like this for about 4 months and again I went off the pill. Each month I prayed that I would get pregnant and each month I was not. There were a few months I thought I was so those were very hard for me. We then went to a fertility specialist who put me on Clomid. I thought that I would be pregnant that first month. We tried 3 rounds of that and decided that we didn't want to go into any more "extreme" fertility treatments. I still was consumed with wanting another baby.

Dave looked at me and said "Why don't we look into adoption?" We talked about it before so why not?". I hit the ground running..I started researching agencies and programs and within a week we attended our first adoption seminar. We left there with an adoption application packet. In the car I was talking a mile a minute about the seminar and finally I looked at Dave and asked him what he thought. I did not want to get my hopes up for him to decide adoption wasn't for us. He looked at me and said "nothing would be more honorable than to give a child a loving home who wouldn't be able to have one without us." I melted instantly. This was the man that I had fallen in love with 8 years ago telling me that yes adoption was definitely the way to expand our family. We quickly decided on adopting a baby girl from China. We then finally picked the right agency.

Throughout this journey I have thought about the words from a song by Garth Brooks called "Unanswered Prayers" Part of the chorus goes "Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers. Remember when your talkin to the man upstairs that just because he doesn't answer doesn't mean he don't care. Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers." I firmly believe that God didn't answer my prayer to become pregnant because my daughter would be born miles away in another country. I now pray that God will take care of her while she is in utero and until someone finds her and then until I am able to travel across the world to bring her home.

Feeling discouraged

Well today I found out we are not getting our final document in a week as I had thought. We are still being "expedited" seeing that they are taking 6-8 weeks to complete. We will hopefully get it in the mail by the 2nd week in August. I am just frustrated because I doubt there will be any way we will have our documents sent to China in August. Every delay just makes our wait to get to China to get Diana longer. I know it will happen but I originally thought that my documents would be to our agency by my birthday. Once reality set in with that I thought that for sure they would be there by the beginning of August to ensure an August DTC/LID. I am positive they will be sent out in September so I guess that is a good thing. I just hope that they start processing more than 2 weeks worth of dossiers at a time soon.

Its a.......boy?????

Parker

Mary Jane aka MJ

Checking each other out

Mary Jane & Parker

Well we figured since we have a while before we go to China to get Diana we would adopt domestically. We have added another boy to our family. His name is Parker and he is a 2 year old beagle. He is so different from MJ. He is very laid back and relaxed. We all know that MJ wants to be in your face and she wants to be the center of attention. He is just as happy to let her bask in the spotlight and then get whatever you are willing to give him. So far he is adjusting very well to all of us. I think since Dave let him out of his cage this afternoon Dave is now his favorite. We will see tomorrow since I will be home with him all day. Everyone is getting along quite well and we hope to continue to see the pups become great friends. The boys love him and are extremely excited that we now have two dogs.

Things for Diana

Necklace with Diana's name in English & Chinese

Diana's first Minnie Mouse

Chinese porcelain doll from Epcot

Sonya Lee doll from the Little People

Well I am finally posting the pictures of the things that we got for Diana in Disney World. The necklace is my favorite! I just had to buy her a Minnie Mouse while we were there. The doll is actually for the both of us to share. I have another Chinese porcelain doll who is even more special to me. I was on eBay looking at a specific auction but couldn't afford to bid on anything. I then was looking at dolls. When I saw this one's name was "Diana" I of course had to bid on it. It is not the best quality as far as my doll collection goes but trust me it is one of my most cherished. I thought of it as a sign that we were meant to go through this adoption process. I also posted a picture of the Little people doll we got her. This week I was going through some stuff and stumbled across a box of infant/toddler toys that I had packed away. I went through them and was able to salvage most of them. It looks like Diana's toy collection is already getting to be a decent size.

Kisses In The Wind

I hold you in my heart and touch you in my dreams.
You are here each day with me, at least that's how it seems.
I know you wonder where we are... what's taking us so long.
But remember child, I love you so and God will keep you strong.
Now go outside and feel the breeze and let it touch your skin...
Because tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.
May God hold you in His hand until I can be with you.
I promise you, my darling, I'm doing all that I can do.
Very soon, you'll have a family for real, not just pretend.
But for tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.
May God wrap you in His arms and hold you very tight.
And let the angels bring the kisses that I send to you each night.
--- Unknown



This is one of my favorite adoption related poems. I will continue to post ones I like as the mood stikes or as I find them.

Thinking of Diana

Today was a busy day. I had an early morning doctors appointment and then we did some errands. I FINALLY got the boys pool set up today. That meant I had to pull weeds on the patio and the list goes on....Funny though even though I was so busy Diana was on my mind a lot today. While doing errands I found a cute little plush Little People of Sonya Lee. For those of you not familiar with the Little People line she is the Asian character. As soon as I showed the boys what I found they both said that Diana will love it. Of course we now own it and it is waiting for her in her room. I just want her to know how bad we want to meet her and become her family. She is already a part of our lives and she probably hasn't even been born yet. Diana....Mommy loves you and can't wait to hold you in her arms....

I have been tagged

This is my first tag...I'm sure it won't be the last. Here goes nothing.

"7" Things I would like to do before I die...
1. Bring Diana home
2. Attend all my childrens' weddings
3. Hold all of my grandchildren
4. Go to Hawaii
5. Go to Australia
6. Go on a cruise
7. Maintain a healthy lifestyle

"7" Things I cannot do...
1. Hold a grudge
2. Be late
3. Swim very well
4. Watch gory movies
5. Run
6. Stop worrying about my children
7. Stop loving my family

"7" Things I can do...
1. Tell my children I love them
2. Be there for my family
3. Be there for my friends
4. Love my husband
5. Respect people
6. Understand people
7. Dream

"7" Things that attracted me to Dave
1. His humor
2. His eyes
3. His sarcastic ways
4. His sweetness
5. His compassion
6. The way he fell in love with all of me the good and the bad
7. His understanding of people

"7" Things I say most often...
1. When we go get Diana
2. When we are in China
3. Has that letter gotten here yet?
4. I love you to both the boys and to Dave
5. No
6. Be careful to Dave when he leaves for work
7. Because I said no (oh my I am my mother!!)

"7" books I love...
1. Angela's Ashes
2. All the Harry Potter books
3. Marley and Me
4. Any cookbook I can get my hands on
5. She's Come Undone
6 A Walk To Remember
7. Any of the Chicken Soup for the Soul books

"7" movies I love...
1. Westside Story
2. Annie
3. Beauty and the Beast
4. Grease
5. Terms of Enderment
6. Jerry McGuire
7. Spiderman

It has arrived!!

The infamous fingerprint letter!!

Well after almost 4 weeks our fingerprint letter actually found its way to my mailbox! I was so excited to see it in the mail today. Hopefully if Dave and I are able to get off work in time tomorrow we will go then. According to USCIS they will expedite our I171-H and we should get about a week after we get fingerprinted. After we get our final paper Dave and I will spend a day downtown going to the Secratary Of State office to get all of our forms certified, then get the seals photocopied and then going to the Chinese Consulate and dropping them off for authenecation. The authentication takes about a week so we will have them send them back to us in a pre-paid mailer. We are getting closer!!! Yea!!!

Finally an answer....

Well I finally heard from my social worker about why it is taking so long to get our finger print letter. Apparently our home study either got lost in the mail or CIS has lost it. My social worker was able to fax CIS our home study and we should expect to hear from CIS by next Monday. Since CIS is taking responsibility for this they said we should expect our I171-H in about a week after we get fingerprinted!! This is great news since I wanted to be DTC sometime in August and now it looks it really is possilble. Keep your fingers crossed that we things go as planned. I will continue to keep you posted.

Our trip to Disney World

The boys with the bears from Brother Bear

Family picture with Mickey Mouse

After finding out where we were going...

On Monday June 26 we woke the boys up to tell them we were leaving soon to go to Disney world! They were beyond surprised and excitement. It was sooo awesome. Besides having a few issues with the weather we had a blast. I don't think that I really knew how exciting it would be to see that place through the eyes of your child. The boys even talked about when Diana is five what they will show her when we come back. I thought that was really sweet. We did buy her a few things like a Minnie Mouse stuffed animal and while we were at Epcot I found a necklace with her name in English and then the Chinese characters. I just couldn't resist especially since I didn't even know what I was looking at when I went over there and saw the name "Diana" immediately. Yet another sign. I will post pictures of what we got Diana another time.

Our story....

Taken Mother's Day 2006

We decided in March of 2006 to expand our family through adoption. Dave and I have always talked about adopting but after having twin boys we thought that was just a dream. After many years of that idea being pushed aside we are actually doing it!!! We are using a great agency called CCAI and are using Glenkirk as our homestudy agency. I can't say enough about either of them. We are currently waiting to get finger printed and then only need one more document....The light at the end of the tunnel is closer but it still feels a long way away.

When we decided to adopt and told the boys they were very excited. Bailey's main concern was that we wouldn't be able to speak "China" to the baby. I reassured him that when we got her she would be little enough that she really wouldn't be talking yet. I told him that we would teach her English together and that we would learn a little Chinese. That eased his mind. Matthew has told me he will teach her how to count and her "ABC"s. I told him he will be a good big brother.