An Amazing Day

Wow! I am still on a high 72 hours after the date! This past Sunday my boys made their 1st holy communion. I didn't realize how touched I would be to witness this. My boys worked long and hard this past year, memorizing prayers, talking about reconciliation, learning more and more about God, Jesus and our church. They have amazed me with their thoughts and feelings and all I can say is I'm truly blessed. Two years ago my boys hadn't been in a church more than a handful of times and now in the past year we have become extremely active within our new church. Thanks to the S family we found the perfect church for us and the pay off this weekend made it all beyond worthwhile that we drive a half hour every Sunday for church and CCD.

The weather couldn't have been beat. It was sunny and 70ish. Actually it matched my mood. I was nervous for them but of course they were fine. The church really made the mass all about the 11 children who would receive the body Christ for the first time. Before mass began Father took out his guitar and he and the children sang a song together. The children did all the readings, collected the donations (with the help of a proud mommy and daddy =) ), and brought up the gifts. They went up to the alter as Father prepared the Eucharist and said the Lord's prayer together with Father. They lit candles and proclaimed their baptismal promise that we proclaimed on their behalf 8 years ago. They presented us moms with a single white rose and even as I look at it now I cry at its beauty. We proceeded as a family to witness the boys take their first communion and then took communion ourselves. We said a special prayer over our children and told them how proud of them we are. The finale was the children singing a song. My sweet loving Matthew cried as he sang. When we asked him later why he was crying he said they were tears of joy. He really did feel how special the day was.

After our glorious mass we proceeded home and had party to celebrate with our family and friends. The boys looked so handsome and never complained when we made them wear their shirts and ties all afternoon.

As they were getting ready to go to bed the boys asked if I would read to them from one of their books they got that day about the 10 commandments. We read it and I just looked at them and was again amazed at what special boys God has placed in my care.

Remembering....

This picture was taken in December to give to Grandma for Christmas. Aren't they cute???

My babies at one day old snuggled close together in the bassinet in our hospital room! Can you see why its my favorite picture of them?

This post started in my head yesterday as I dropped my boys off at a roller skating party. I remember thinking that I myself had a birthday party at a roller rink. I also remember many other parties that I went to there and thought how weird it is that I'm the mom dropping the kids off while they get to skate. The scary thing though? Even though its a totally different rink...it smelled the same and brought back all the memories that I probably haven't thought of in over 20 years.

I thought of my friends who I had back then and now three of them thanks to Facebook are somewhat in my life again. Another friend Tamie has been consistent but I can't remember if her and I were ever at a skating party together. I do remember Dawn and Jenny G. being there. I even remember a confrontation I had with Jenny's sister before my own b-day party. I also remember her and I finally making up at this party. Weird how I thought about that yesterday.

I was also going through pictures for Matthew to bring to school since he is Star of the Week this week. Bailey was King Bee last week (same concept different name.) He wanted a copy of my all time favorite picture of the boys. They were a day old and to this day I remember seeing my boys snuggled together in the bassinet in the hospital. I remember staring at them in awe and disbelief that they were real. I remember thinking I get to take them home and love them for the rest of my life and although I was scared to death I was ready for the challenge. I remember feeling so full. My family had doubled in the matter of hours (there is 2 hours and 15 minutes between the boys), and I felt complete.

Packing all of their stuff up and getting them bundled for our first ride home made me almost giddy. I was scared because it was snowing out and we had a 45 minute ride. I wanted to sit in the backseat between them but I knew I couldn't wedge myself back there so I sat in the front and my neck was strained by the time we got home.

People ask me all the time how I handled twins. My answer has never wavered. I didn't know anything else. Being a first time mommy with twins was no different than just being a first time mommy period. It was new, it was an adjustment, there were times I cried because I thought I couldn't do it but I did. I do tell people that the first year is a blur and for the most part it was. I can look at pictures and remember certain ones others...not so much.

I remember some of my fondest memories of Dave in those early days were him sitting on a chair in our loft feeding one baby with me on the futon with the other. We were both trying to stay awake yet not fully so we would be able to get back to sleep. I remember falling in love with him all over again knowing that other people weren't as lucky as I was to have their husband help with these kinds of things. Dave and I have always been a team but were more so with newborn babies.

Those babies have grown so much in the past 8 years. Ironically we ran into their preschool teacher at the grocery store this afternoon. In the three years since preschool ended we have not ran into her living in the same town. Today I laughed as the boys told her what they are now into and Mrs F told me that they look exactly the same except taller. Bailey almost didn't remember having glasses when he was in preschool so he questioned her on it. She asked them about school and asked if they liked it. She told them she was glad that she got to see them. It really was endearing.

My boys are halfway through second grade and have soared yet again. I was surprised at how well they scored on the comprehension standardized tests they took this fall. I am amazed how sometimes listening to them I think I am already living with preteens. When I look back at the pictures I can see them toddling through our town house, taking their first steps, speaking their first words. Looking at them now as they get ready to make their first reconciliation to prepare them for their first communion I see the beginnings of little men. To me though....they will always be those cute babies snuggled up together in the bassinet.

Laughter Lives Tuesday...week 2

This post is part of "Laughter Lives! Tuesday" on the Riggs Family Blog. Check our their blog to read everyone else's "Laughter Lives!" posts.



This weeks topic of Laughter Lives Tuesday is:

Funny Things That Happened At...Church, weddings, funeral, anniversary... any family event.

I actually have a couple to share!

Shhhh She's Sleeping!

We were at the wake of Dave's aunt when the boys were about 3 or so. It was an open casket so the boys could definitely see Auntie Irene. I never took them too close to it so they decided that that she must be sleeping. Anytime people would get really loud the boys in unison would say "Shhhh she's sleeping." People would smile and quiet down a bit and of course would later get louder again. The story was a never ending loop except at times people would start to crack up and that would just get the boys more upset!

Yawn

Over the summer we found ourselves going to either the 4:30PM Saturday mass or the 8:00AM Sunday mass so we could spend the rest of Sunday doing family fun things. On one of these occasions Matthew was extremely tired albeit a little bored as well. I swear every time it got extremely quiet between readings or songs you would hear a long loud yawn. I don't know which of us wanted to kill him first. We would hear him yawn and give him the evil eye. He would look at us as if to say "Did I do something wrong?". Of course it wasn't any better since there weren't a lot of people in church on that day. I was amazed and thankful that the priest didn't tease Matthew or us about it as we were leaving. How embarrassing!

Laughter Lives Tuesday

This post is part of "Laughter Lives! Tuesday" on the Riggs Family Blog. Check our their blog to read everyone else's "Laughter Lives!" posts.

This is the first time I am particiapating in this and I'm not sure how often I will do so. Check on the link above to both pray for Abby and to also read other funny stories. This week we are suppose to write of the funny/silly ways our children tell us they love us.


I LOVE YOU STINKY MOMMY

When I wake up the boys in the morning I typically get in their beds and snuggle up to them to wake them up. The other day I crawl in bed with Bailey and and tell him good morning as I rub his back. He says "Good morning stinky mommy." I proceed to ask why I'm stinky and he says just because. I then tell him I love him. Of course his response was "I love you stinky mommy!"

Somehow this has stuck now for over a week and now everyone in the house is stinky. So if you come to our house and Bailey calls you Stinky. Take it as a term of endearment and remember he's 8!

Time For Changes...

and no I'm not talking about the new president getting ready to take office. I do not talk about politics to many people let alone to an audience of my (gasp) blogger followers.

I am talking about all the changes that start this week in our house in the burbs. I should probably back track a little just to get you all up to speed. If you know all this already skim up until you can see the typing become shaky.

I know I mentioned in past posts that my hours had been cut at work. A few weeks before Christmas I thought I was gaining a couple hours because we were restructuring a few different people's jobs. I was beyond thrilled and even told my supervisor it was an early Christmas present. Well folks that lasted all of 72 hours. I had worked an extra day to fill in for a coworker and then went home. I heard the phone ring, saw work on caller id and figured they had a question about something that had happened. No big deal right? WRONG. Dead Wrong!!!

I could hear my office managers voice shaking as she told me they had to cut my hours. She told me that they had also let two other of my co-workers go. She said business (as I knew) was beyond slow. She also told me that my hours as well as being cut had changed too. My heart feel to my stomach and I didn't know what to say or do. She told me she thought it was temporary and that I would eventually get more hours than I knew what to do with. We hung up and I started to sob and called my bff K. She would keep me sane until Dave came home with the kids. We talked, she did the pep talk thing. She told me not to break down in front of the kids and told me that we (Dave and I) would make it through. The irony of all this you ask? I had quickly typed up my resume just that morning and submitted to a company for a full time job. I knew I would never get that job but I had done it.

So Dave gets home I tell the kids to start their homework and tell Dave to follow me to our room. I shook as I told him. He looked at me in utter disbelief but in typical Dave fashion he said we would be fine. He told me we would get through it and reminded me of all the other things we had over come in the 11 years we had been together. I tried to believe him but was not nearly as certain as he was. I tried my hardest to act normal in front of the boys. I do recall even eating a little bit at dinner that night.

I did see an ad on line for a job that looked perfect for me. I polished up the resume and submitted it. A few days later the agency called me and asked me a few questions. She liked my answers and asked me to come in for an interview. I was terrified. The interview went relatively well and I realized she was impressed with all I told her. I took a few tests (typing, data entry, and MS Word) and was sent on my way. I went over to K's house feeling confident.

I called a few days later to touch bases with the agency. She assured me the office manager hadn't made any decisions as to who they wanted to interview. The Friday before Christmas the agency calls me and asks me to come in for an interview the following Tuesday.

I won't go into the lack of sleep that weekend. The day of the interview I get a call before 9am cancelling my 3pm interview. The weather is bad and the office manager doesn't want to put me under any stress in getting there (is she serious????). I am told she will be out of the office until the 5Th of January and she is not interviewing anyone else until she gets back. I go on with my life of working the new horrible schedule and spending time with family and friends for the holidays.

I go on my interview the 6Th of January. I leave unsure of how to react. I am confused and not sure what the office manager thought of me. I am relieved that it is done. I get a call from the agency asking me how it went. I tell her the interview was good and she informs me the office manager was beyond pleased with me (which did really surprise me). I get a call later that afternoon asking me if I can meet with the head doctor the next day for another interview. I say I will move mountains to get there.

I was beyond impressed with the doctor who interviewed me. She is sweet and accommodating yet has an air about her that you just have to respect. She asked me thought provoking questions but nothing that was hard at all. I felt comfortable. I left there feeling like I was a definite candidate for the job but not as confident as Dave was that I had gotten the job. He told me before I left for my interview the job was mine for the taking (he really can be a good cheerleader!).

I get to work after my interview and it was like a whirlwind. The agency calls me to see how I thought things went and asked if I was still interested. I say yes and she says she will be in touch. I don't expect to hear from her again that day. About an hour or so later my cell phone rings again and its the agency. I know now that I will have an answer and I begin to shake uncontrollably. I can't talk at the moment so I have to call her back. I do what I need to do but honestly I couldn't tell you what I did in the time between me hanging up with her and then calling her back. She tells me she is officially offering me the job on behalf of the office of.....I am flabbergasted and don't know what to say besides "YES, YES, YES!!!" I tell her I will go tell my office manager before she leaves for the day.

I give my immediate supervisor notice before I can even comprehend what I am doing. I am still shaking and I am full of every emotion you can think of. She tells me to tell the the office manager who actually calms my fear (somewhat) by telling me she's relieved because she is certain there are going to be more negative changes happening in the office and she fears she would have to let me go soon. I had proposed to staying on a few Saturdays a month and to copy charts still which she says fine too. She then tells me to go tell my husband.

Poor Dave, my biggest cheerleader is the third to know I got the job. He will tease me until the day I die about that but I know he knows I really had no choice. When I got home from work that night he reminds me that he promised me just a few weeks before that everything would be okay. I smile and tell him I know.

So Tuesday I start at my new office. I go from dealing with pediatric patients and their parents to dealing with patients who are mainly older than me. I will spend one week working at both jobs and it will be scary and sad and exciting all at the same time.

I wonder how long I will continue to work at SPA on a part time basis. I wonder if I will fade away from there or will those hours fade because someone else needs them. I wonder if I will forge the great friendships I that I made in my six years at SPA. I wonder if those friendships will survive now that I'm not there as often as before. I wonder how quickly I will feel comfortable at FPMG. I wonder how my family life will improve when I'm not secretly waiting for the other shoe to drop. I wonder how long it will take until we really see the financial difference in the steady hours not to mention the better pay I will be getting.

The only thing that I don't doubt in all of this God. The way this whole thing went down I can not equate it to anything else. Why else would I have wrote up my resume the same day my hours were cut? Why else would that have been the only job I truly wanted and then in the long run gotten? Why else did I feel at ease (for the most part) during all three interviews when I hadn't been on an interview for 6.5 years? I know that God was there the whole time answering my prayers to help keep my family afloat. This is why I am certain this job was meant for me.

Stay tuned for more changes that are in the works in our house in the burbs.....

Get Well Soon

Sunday morning I woke up the boys and told them our final family Christmas party was cancelled. I let them know that Don (close older male friend) was in the hospital. Matthew immediately starts to cry and in my mom of the year fashion think that he's upset since he won't be getting the presents he's expecting. He says "I feel so sad for Don, Mommy!" I tell him that Don will be better soon and remind him how he was in the hospital and they made him feel better and now look at him. He smiles and I think the subject is closed.

We go down to the main level and he says he needs to get something out of the basement. I figured it was his DS since he just bought himself a new game thanks to Auntie Kathi and Aunt Cassandra. He comes up and hands me a piece of yellow construction paper. He made Don a Get Well Soon card. He did this completely unprompted. I told him we will definitely get it off to Don. (Notice that he signed it from Bay as well!)

I am so proud of my boy!! Again though I will NOT be a contender for mom of the year in 2009...and to think I was in the running for all of 3 days this year!

December Recapped In Bullets

I guess my new years resolution should be to be a better blogger but we all know how long we keep those resolutions to begin with so maybe not! I will recap some of our highlights of the month.

• We took the boys and a friend each to Legoland Discovery Centre for their birthday. It was really cool and all the boys had a blast. Granted it wasn't as cool as Legoland in California but in the eyes of 7 & 8 year old boys it was awesome. We then went out for dinner and each boy got to make their own pizza. How cool is that?

• We went to the boys school for breakfast with Santa. It was fun seeing all the kids eating breakfast together and also meeting the teachers' families as well. We didn't win any raffles this year but I think the boys have forgotten about it by now.

• I went to my annual cookie/gift exchange with the gals from work and as always had a blast. The woman I work with are incredible!

• The boys sang two songs at the Christmas concert and looked so sweet singing their hearts out with their fellow classmates. Unfortunately school was cancelled the next day which would have been their party but I think they have long forgotten.

• We had Dave's family over for a Christmas celebration. It was not exactly what I had planned to begin with but we were all together and that's really all that matters. Of course the boys were in awe of all their gifts from Uncle Ray and Auntie Vicki.

• Christmas Eve was amazing. We went to the children's mass at church and it was awesome. I have never been to a children's mass and I have to say I was impressed and can't wait to go again next year. We then head to my brother-in-law and sister-in-law's house for our traditional Christmas Eve dinner. The food as always was incredible as was the company. We got to meet my youngest nephew's (he's 20) girlfriend. She is a sweet girl. The boys were showered with more gifts and then we came home to prepare for Santa.

• Christmas Day. Oh what a day it was. The boys were amazed that Santa finally got them a Wii and that Grandma talked to Santa so she knew what accessories to get for it. I'd like to say that dinner went off without a hitch but what is a holiday without drama right? We had a small oven fire and although our house was extremely smokey no one was hurt. The fire department wasn't called and our food all turned out. All in all I would say it was a successful day.

• New Years Eve Dave and I went out to dinner and then came home to watch two videos. We quietly rang in the new year together. I would like to wish you and your family a Happy New Year! May 2009 bring you good health, happiness and love. And for those of us still waiting for our children in China may it bring us all that much closer to bringing our babies home.

Let The Crazy Begin!

This is the exact time in December when the craziness begins and doesn't stop until the first weekend in January. I know this is that same time for most people. We just have one other challenge that lends itself to the mix: The boys birthday!!!!!!!

Yesterday after we picked the kids up from school we headed to the mall to take the kids to see Santa. Bailey was impressed that Santa thanked him for the letter with the money! He knew it had to be the real Santa for sure then. After that we had dinner and more errands.

Today we will be leaving shortly to go have breakfast at the kids' school. The kids will get to buy their presents for all of us and also have another visit with Santa! When we get home we await two of their friends for some birthday party fun! We are taking 4 boys to Legoland Discovery Centre to celebrate their birthday. They are soooooooooo excited! I will post pictures later this weekend.

Tomorrow we meet up with my sister and niece to get Grandma's Christmas present. The boys having seen their cousin in a while so it should be a blast.

The next week is so jammed packed I can't even put my head around it. Stay tuned for more details of how this week unfolds.

Hope you enjoy the picture!

Dear Santa

Yesterday Bailey was home sick with a sore throat. We were sitting on the couch and he was telling me he really wants a Wii for Christmas. He tells me that is all he wants and that maybe a few things in his stocking. I tell him he will have to tell Santa about it but I think that is a great idea.

Later Matthew is skimming through the Target, Toys R Us and Walmart toy ads for the hundredth time. He is saying he wants this and that and so on. I told him that was a lot to be asking for. I told him that Santa had talked to me and said that things were going to be harder this Christmas. He just looked at me for a moment and went on to tell me all he wanted.

A while later Bailey comes upstairs takes a piece of paper and tells me he is writing a letter to Santa. When he produced it to me asking me how we can send it I almost started to cry. For those of you who can't read Bailey's chicken scratch it says:

"Dear Santa,

I want a Wii and a Wii controller. I know you are running low on money so here is a little money with this card.

From,

Bailey"

He attached $1.50 in a baggie. My little boy is so sweet and caring yet it breaks my heart that he has to be concerned with finances at almost 8.

My bff K says that Bailey has a great investment going on. If he gives Santa $1.50 and he gets a Wii he has made a huge profit. I got a great laugh out of that one and of course Bailey didn't get it (thank goodness). I have told Bailey that we have a few unused games that we will drop off at one of the toy drives to help Santa as well.

I am so blessed to have a boy like Bailey!

Halloween Activities, Visits With Old Friends & Whatever Else I Decide To Post About

Where do I begin? OK lets get Halloween out of the way. We had another great year of Halloween fun. Matthew is already talking about his costume for next year! We went trick-or-treating at the businesses in our town the weekend before Halloween. The kids had a blast and since the weather was fair I didn't complain. We were lucky that Grandma was able to come with us as well.

We were also lucky that Grandma took a half day on Halloween so she got to see the boys in their school parade and then got to go to their class parties. Grandma stayed behind to pass out candy while we went with the S family trick-or-treating. We also had our neighbors with us as well. As always the grown ups were worn out before the kiddos were. We then to keep up family tradition went trick-or-treating at Auntie Kathi's and Uncle Bob's house. We had a yummy dinner there as well.

I mentioned in an earlier post how much I loved Facebook. Today I met up with Natalie (who I met up with before) and another good friend of ours Caty. It was soooo much fun talking to both of them and reminiscing about the things we did. We spent about 3+ hours at the restaurant just gabbing away. I swore I was gonna open those year books because I didn't remember some of the people they were talking about it. We had decided that we will meet up again in December and hopefully we can keep this up.

We have done a lot of church activities as well lately. We had Oktober Fest at church two weeks ago. I have learned that Matthew is very protective of me. We were in the beer tent and the band was playing and some guy pulled me on the dance floor. We are dancing and the guy asks me if I think Dave will have a problem with us dancing. I tell him probably not. Next thing I know Matthew is giving this guy a dirty look and begins dancing between the two of us. He then pulls me away from the guy.

I told Dave about the question the guy asked and he says "Rather him dance than me." and then Matthew says "Mommy, you should have been dancing with Daddy." I told him Daddy didn't want to dance. He then says I should only dance with Daddy or Bailey or him. It was very sweet.

Last week the grandparents were invited to come to CCD with the students. The boys had fun showing Grandma what they are learning in class. They also preformed a song for the grandparents. After Mass we all had lunch at the church. Grandma was lucky enough to win a prize as well.

Oh yes my ladybug did a boo bag swap. I was lucky enough to get paired with my friend Karmen and boy did she spoil the boys and I. Diana even got a cow flashlight so she can find her way to Karmen in Wisconsin when she gets here. Thanks again Karmen! You really are a special friend!

Two Years & Waiting.....

The figurine we got to remind us of our baby girl

Two years have now gone by since we were given our Log In Date. Two years and I really have no idea how much more time we have to wait. I do know that Diana is out there and she is meant for our family. I know that no matter how much longer it takes we will wait. I know that without a doubt our family is not complete yet. We are missing a little girl who possibly isn't even born yet. We will wait no matter how long it takes.

A good friend of mine just sent me a LID gift and in her card told me I am that much closer to Diana. I know she is right. The mug she sent said "Go confidently in the direction of your dreams." Henry David Thoreau. I thought that was great encouragement. Also she send a book of quotes about hopes and dreams. I thought this was a good one too:"Don't be afraid of the space between your dreams and reality. If you can dream it, you can make it so." Belva Davis. We dream about her all the time and she WILL be here and we will embrace her with all the love we have been saving for her.

While Dave and I were out on our little anniversary weekend I found the cutest little figurine from the Charming Tails collection. We didn't buy it then but once we got home I got a great deal on it from eBay. It arrived today just a day after our LID. It is my little gift to myself to remind me that our dream is still alive and that we will hold tight until our little girl is placed in our arms. Ironically enough there is a ladybug on the front of it as well.



Diana~Mommy wishes she knew how much longer she had to wait to have you in her arms, but be assured that she will wait no matter how many tomorrows it takes for it to happen. Mommy and Daddy love you very much and can't wait for you to join our family. Your brothers already adore you and can't wait to play with you and protect you like only big brothers can. Hold tight my little one until Mommy and Daddy can come to you. We love you!

Fall Fun & 10 Years With My Best Friend

For those of you who know me you know the fall is my favorite time of the year. I love when it starts to get cool outside. I love the the colors of the leaves on the trees. Still after all these years I still love to crunch the dead leaves on the ground. I love the way it sounds and how it makes me feel. I love the fact that its Dave's favorite time of the year too. Since getting together I can't remember a year that we haven't gone apple picking. We used to take our nephews, now of course, we take the boys. The boys get just as excited about it as we do.

This fall was even more special since Dave and I celebrated our 10Th anniversary. I still can't believe that we've been married 10 years! I can give you every detail of the night he proposed and tell you most of the things we planned together for our wedding. I can tell you that looking into his eyes as we both cried happy tears as we repeated our vows is still one of the most special memories I have ever experienced. I remember dancing as husband and wife for the first time and I remember doing nothing but smiling all day long.

Ten years later he still makes me smile. He still is the first person I run to tell things too. He is my rock, and my anchor and beyond everything else he is my best friend. What is funny is even though he is no longer the same man I married 10years ago he is so much better than that man. I know he will change even more as time goes on and yet I know I will love him even more than I do now.

We celebrated our anniversary by spending an awesome weekend in Wisconsin at a fabulous B&B. The food and inn keepers were great! We went for a few drives to check out the colors, we went to a cave and we went to a play. Most importantly we reconnected. We laughed, we cried happy tears, we reminisced and fell deeper into love with each other.

After returning refreshed and relaxed we took the boys apple picking on Monday. We picked a peck of apples. The kids got to do the apple launcher, play in the play area and pet the animals. We snacked on apple cider slushies and of course apple cider doughnuts. We did half of the corn maze and have come to the conclusion that the boys aren't quite ready for them yet. Even they say it was their least favorite part of the day.

I love weekends like this. Enjoy the pictures. I will try to scan a picture soon of Dave and I from our wedding until then enjoy the pictures from the weekend.

If You've Ever Prayed...Please Do So Now!

Please Please Please pray for a very special family I know. I met Carole on my favorite adoption boards. She, at that point was adopting Julia from China. Since then she has been home from China and just recently home from Ethiopia after picking up her sons Paul and Samuel. You can read more about her journey to the boys here. I actually was lucky enough to meet Carole and her darling daughters this past spring along with another ladybug friend. If you feel you want to you can read about it here. We were suppose to meet up in a couple weeks again so that we could meet Paul and Samuel.

Carole's son Samuel (age 3 1/2) was in a horrible accident this past weekend. He is in the PICU at Children's Hospital Of Wisconsin in Milwaukee. Their family needs all the prayers they can get. I am asking if you have ever prayed, ever been compelled to pray that you do so now. Here is a link for the website she has created to update everyone of his progress. If you are compelled to do so please leave a comment to let them know you are praying/thinking of/sending good thoughts to them. Carole is amazed by how many people are rallying with them for their little guy!

Old Friends & Technology

A few months ago some of my ladybug friends were going on and on about Facebook and were encouraging everyone else to join. I joined halfheartedly and thought nothing of it really. I have been amazed at how powerful it has really been for me since joining. I have caught up with some of my friends from high school by either just becoming their "friends" again or by sending messages. Others have fit back in my circle just like a pair of old jeans!

Cassandra and I have actually known each other since grammar school. I tease her that she followed me to my high school (it was NOT our feeder school) since she is a couple years younger than me. It was actually in high school that we became really close. She and her family moved away and like any kids we tried to keep in touch but then lost touch. About 6 weeks ago she found me on Facebook and we have reconnected like there has been no distance between us. I am hoping that eventually I will get to West Virginia to meet up with her in person again!

A couple weeks ago I became "friends" with Onaje who I went to school with. He and I got along really well in high school! Throughout the years he and one of my best friends Natalie dated off and on. The last time I had talked to Natalie her and Onaje were planning their wedding (as were Dave and I). Anyway I told Onaje to have Natalie email me.

Natalie joined Facebook and by the end of that first day we had made plans to meet up! Yesterday despite our kids we talked and talked for over six hours! We could have talked even longer but her daughter and my boys had had it! It was so much fun to not only catch up with her but to know that we were again right there in each other's lives. I know that we will continue to talk and get together and again she is in my circle! We decided next time it will be just her and I and then eventually we will meet up with the husbands.

I want to thank my ladybug friends for encouraging me to join Facebook. It amazes me how technology has been able to link me with some people who I thought I would never hear from again! Technology really is a good thing. Actually Natalie and I were just laughing about us taking our computer class freshman year and saying how we didn't believe back then that computers would be as important as they kept telling us they would be. Who knew???

Interviews

My friend Janet did this interview with her kids and I loved it. Here are Bailey and Matthews answers. BTW be sure to check out Janet's blog. She is super sweet and her posts crack me up almost always!

Bailey's Answers

1. What is something your mom always says to you?

I love you!

2. What makes mom happy?

when she tickles me

3. What makes mom sad?

When she has to spank me and Matthew(they don't get spanked too often no need to contact family services...LOL)

4. How does your mom make you laugh?

when she tickles me

5. What was your mom like as a child?

I don't know!

6. How old is your mom?

Its 35, 36 or 37

7. How tall is your mom?

I think she's 5'5" (he's givin another inche yea!)

8. What is her favorite thing to do?

give us hugs and kisses

9. What does your mom do when you're not around?

go to work and shopping

10. What is your mom really good at?

going on the computer

11. What is your mom not very good at?

running (how true)

12. What does your mom do for her job?

A person at the doctors office that gets the files and checks people in. (I am a receptionist at a pediatricians office.)

13. What is your mom's favorite food?

sweet potatoes (not really)

14. What makes you proud of your mom?

her job

15. What do you and your mom do together?

see movies

17. How are you and your mom different?

I wear glasses she doesn't.

18. How do you know your mom loves you?

When see hugs and kisses me I know... and when she makes my bad dreams go away cuz sometimes I have bad bad dreams.

Matthew's answers

1. What is something your mom always says to you?M

Chuchi Bobaluci (this is one of my many nicknames for him.)

2. What makes mom happy?

Me!

3. What makes mom sad?

If me and bailey got lost. (Sad would be an understatement!)

4. How does your mom make you laugh?

by saying funny things

5. What was your mom like as a child?

a good person

6. How old is your mom?

36

7. How tall is your mom?

5 feet (I can't stand to lose any height kiddo!)

8. What is her favorite thing to do?

spend time with us (Couldn't have thought of a better answer myself!)

9. What does your mom do when you're not around?

go to work

10. What is your mom really good at?

playing on the computer

11. What is your mom not very good at?

Singing, wait no, uhhh hmmmm playing the guitar (Honestly I'm not good at either!)

12. What does your mom do for her job?

work at a doctors office

13. What is your mom's favorite food?

her own cooking (NOT!)

14. What makes you proud of your mom?

by loving us (that makes me proud of him!)

15. What do you and your mom do together?

do fun stuff

17. How are you and your mom different?

becasue I'm a boy and my mom's a girl

18. How do you know your mom loves you?

because every night she gives us hugs and kisses

This was a lot of fun! Thanks boys! Mommy loves all your answers!

Second Graders!

Bailey with his three teachers. The one in the middle is the sub.
Matthew with his new teacher.

Bailey outside our front door before school this morning.

Matthew outside our front door before school this morning.

My second graders!

Today was the first day of second grade! How does this keep happening every August? Its amazes me that my little boys are growing up so fast. Monday we dropped off their supplies and got to meet their teachers.

Bailey has two teachers this year. Some of the teachers at our school job share. Bailey will have one teacher on Mondays and Tuesdays and every other Wednesday. He will have the other teacher on Thursdays, Fridays and the other Wednesdays. His one teacher, although we met her on Monday will be on maternity leave until January. He will have another teacher who will be the sub. We met her as well. They all seemed really sweet.

Matthew's actual teacher is on maternity leave as well. I'm really not sure when she will be returning. We got to meet his sub and she is really nice. Matthew actually remembered her from her being a sub for his teacher last year. (Oh yeah and Matthew also lost another tooth on Monday night!!)

Yesterday we went and had a little fun with the kids from the S family (see post below). I took the kids to a place that had bumper boats and also mini-golf. Poor Matthew got stuck on the bumper boat and couldn't steer it back to the dock. He was hysterical but we all tried to keep him calm until the guy was able to help him back. We then went to safer grounds and played glow in the dark mini golf. The kids had a blast. A last day of summer vacation wouldn't be complete without a trip to the ice cream shop.

Today both boys woke up excited without me even having to wake them up! They ate their breakfast and got ready without any problems. They appeased me by taking their year pictures in front of the house. I then proceeded to forget my camera on the dryer instead of taking it to school for more pictures. I am sure secretly the boys are relieved I didn't have it with me. We got them in their lines and then they were off.

Upon picking them up I learned that Matthew cried because he got scared of a wasp outside. In his words he had a "kinda a good day...kinda a bad day". Bailey had a great day and neither can wait to go back again tomorrow.

Here's to another great school year boys! Mommy knows you will do awesome!!

Very Special Friends of Ours

I want to take an opportunity to tell you about another special family we know. We met the S family when the boys were in kindergarten. Matthew and their youngest J were in class together. We then found out they only live about 2 blocks away in our subdivision. Since then the boys have played a lot together. I sometimes joke that J is my third son. The scary thing is he looks more like Bailey than Matthew does.

We have also gotten to know the whole family even more and have actually been attending the same church as them. Through this we have gotten even closer. My friend D called me to see if I could keep an eye on J and their daughter K for a day. It was so fun having a girl in the house. K will be in 7Th grade next week. She is a delightful young lady and we had a good time scrap booking together while the boys played.

While they were over I was showing K Diana's wish scrapbook. She was so interested in us adopting a baby and also was going on to say how special the book was and how Diana will treasure it. My heart was overcome with so much emotion from this young lady. I have learned that that wasn't the half of it.

After K got home she created me the most beautiful note cards. They are have dragons, lanterns, pagodas, a fan and of course a ladybug! The pictures of these note cards will not do them justice. I am thinking of using them in one of Diana's scrapbooks rather than writing on them and sending them out. They are incredible and it made me feel so good that she thought so much about our journey in creating them. Thank you again K. You are a very special girl!

Her mother D surprised me as well. She gave me a Miraculous Medal. She explained to me that while trying to get pregnant with J she found out about these medals and contacted a church (not sure this is the right one) and they sent her the medal. She says she got pregnant a month later and continued to wear it her whole pregnancy. After J was born she passed it on to him.

I am wearing this as I carry Diana in my heart and will continue to pray for a speed up. Also as D has requested I will give it to Diana once she gets here. I will tell her how her mommy wore it while she waited and about the special woman who got it for her. D-thank you so much for the special gift and of course the gift of your friendship! Both gifts are very special to me.

I Just Want To Be A Mommy & Other Random Thoughts

A picture of the four of us at the aquarium

The boys having a hands free good time on a roller coaster.

The boys with Sponge Bob and Patrick

Matthew as Obi Wan Konobi at the Star Wars exhibit on vacation.

Bailey as a Storm Trooper at the Star Wars exhibit.

So I've been hearing and reading so much lately on adoption being a way to "save children". This could be read into on soooo many levels that I'm not going to go there. I am NOT adopting to save a child from the horrors of life in an orphanage I am NOT adopting to give a child a better life. I AM adopting because I want to be a mommy. Some of you may say "Well Lisa, you already are a mommy." This is true but I want to be a mommy to another child as well.

I love my boys to death and can not for one second picture what my like would be like without them in it. When I told Dave that I wanted another child he wasn't so keen on the idea. I let it sink in for a while. He still didn't go for it. We fought. Boy did we fight! Eventually he mellowed and agreed that having another child would be good for us.

As many of you know adoption was not our first thought. We tried to have another baby the "old fashioned way". It didn't happen and thus here we are.....waiting for Diana in China so we can be her mommy, daddy and big brothers.

Will she be better off in my family? Will she do so much better here than had I NOT adopted her from an orphanage in China? I am sure she will but again everyone is better off in a loved filled environment where they are getting enough attention and nourishment both physically and emotionally.

My bigger question is will we be better off having her in our lives? I do believe that we will be. To have another child look up at me with their sweet eyes calling me "Mommy" will fulfill me in a way nothing else can. To hold the hand of a little one as I guide them and protect them is really all I have ever dreamed of. To love three children instead of two just makes my heart even more full no matter how she came into my life.

OK now onto other topics...

As we live out the last week of summer we are preparing for second grade to start. Did I say that???? Are the boys really going into second grade? I'm afraid its true. We got the letters from their teachers this weekend and we have frantically called classmates seeing who is in who's classes. Its actually kinda fun! We will meet their teachers and drop off supplies on Monday. Stay tuned for pics of that.

We went to the aquarium two weeks ago as a fun family thing to do before everyone gets into the hustle and bustle of school. We had a great time as always! We went to a minor league baseball game last week. We ate well and had lots of fun!

This past weekend my dad, his wife and my sister came in for the weekend. Saturday we got together with our whole family less one cousin and his family (we missed you guys) for dinner. It was great to reconnect with the family and just have a good time. Sunday it was just us with Dad, Melissa and Katie. We had good conversations and so much fun watching Katie play. Bailey was sooooooo good with her. He was extremely protective of her. It made me smile knowing what an awesome big brother he is going to be.

I have tons of Matthew stories bit will just share a few. When we were at the ball park he asked for peanuts and I reminded him that we had some at home so we had them for snack the next day(they were in the shells). He was sooooo cute he comes up to me and says "Mommy the peanuts taste great. There is nothing wrong with them but I think I want a different snack......they are FRUSTRATING me!" I was on the floor laughing and gave him his new request of yogurt.

Also he found his Spider man costume that he wore when he was 3 and has been traipsing around the house in it for weeks! It fits him in the body but it looks like he is wearing Capri's in the legs!! He is happy though so all is good.

Enjoy some pics from our vacation that I never posted and also one of us at the aquarium!

Almost Threw In The Towel

Its been a rough two months in our household in the burbs. We have had a lot of drama and my heart has been racing most of the time. The economy, like most others, is kicking our butts. Dave has never made more money than he is right now and unfortunately we are not seeing it because he is putting so much more right back into his gas tank. See he drives his own car (SUV) to go to all of his stores. He gets paid for his mileage but trust me its no where near enough to make up for what he is putting into it. I on the other hand have lost hours at work and may stand to lose some more this fall. This is not FUN for any of us.

We are thinking of trading in my van and getting Dave a more fuel efficient vehicle and I would take over his SUV since I don't drive nearly as much as he does. The jury is still out on this one though. The kicker is he needs a vehicle that gets decent mileage but he really can't drive a sedan because of his knees. Its hard to find crossover vehicles with decent gas mileage that we can afford.

I've also been doing a lot of thinking about the whole adoption thing. When Dave and I started this process 2 1/2 years ago I never imagined in a million years that we would still be waiting for Diana with no sign of an end in sight. I have been wondering and worrying if we should even continue with the process. I worry about the age difference between the boys and Diana. I worry how I'm going to entertain two 8 year olds and a 1 year old at the same time. I worry that the boys are going to resent Diana when we can't do everything they want because she's too little. I worry about traveling with a little one again.

Am I willing to trade in my freedom? Right now the boys are pretty self sufficient. They play on their own. They feed themselves. They can get their own snacks. Sometimes they even make their own breakfasts and lunches. They don't rely on me for EVERYTHING anymore. Rarely do they wake up in the middle of the night. They are even now beginning to sleep in (even past 8am).

Can I even begin to imagine changing diapers again? Waking up in the middle of the night? Having to feed a one year old again? Planning my days around naps and bedtimes again? Am I ready to quit my job (how few hours it may be) to be home with a child who's not ready for daycare? Am I ready for car seats, cribs, and high chairs again? Am I ready to completely change our family dynamics?

These are the horrible thoughts I have been having for over six weeks now. What is so scary is they were beginning to consume my insides. I was there for Dave and the boys and we really did have fun on vacation but these thoughts have been gnawing on me every time there is a quiet moment.

I haven't been on my favorite adoption board lately because I just couldn't even pretend to be positive. I also didn't want to admit defeat because truthfully I wanted to wallow in my own little pity party that NO ONE not even Dave knew I was having.

I stopped participating in monthly swaps for two reasons. The obvious reason is financial but the other was because I was wondering what would I do with all the stuff I have accumulated in the last 2 1/2 years. I really did wonder what Dave was going to say about all the "wasted" money of all the things I have bought for the arrival of Diana and then for all the swaps if I said I wanted to end the quest.

I have quietly racked my brain for weeks about what to tell Dave. I wondered what the boys would think about not getting a sister after all. I dreaded telling all our family and friends. I think what bothered me the most is that so many of them don't understand this process and so they would just think we had been taken for a ride all along anyway. Of course those of you who are waiting with us know the truth.

Sunday Dave and I were driving to church and again the thoughts were racing. I had actually thought of telling him about my feelings after church. We were in church and as always after communion I begin to pray. I always thank God for Dave, the boys my friends and family. I ask him to continue to guide me and help point me in the right direction. As always I prayed for Diana. I asked God to watch over her no matter if she was born yet or not. As I prayed those words my heart was overcome with such peace. I felt as if God was reassuring me that this is what we are suppose to be doing.

At breakfast (the boys had spent the night at a neighbors so weren't with us). I finally told Dave all that I was thinking and feeling. I told him that I had planned on telling him I was ready to give up. I told him that I couldn't though. I was reminded again at church just how real Diana is to me. She is as real to me as the boys were the second I found out I was pregnant. I AM pregnant! I AM expecting a baby! I realize that this pregnancy is probably the longest gestation known in any animal kingdom but it is one I am willing to endure.

For those of you who know us, or know other people who are enduring this horrible wait. Accept that we are indeed pregnant just like people who are physically expecting a child. Just because you can't see our bellies bulge from growing a baby (Mine is bulging from over eating thank you very much!) doesn't mean we don't feel the same about our child. Ask us about the wait and actually listen to what we have to say. I don't expect you to totally get the process because I don't and I'm going through it...but do realize that China is not out for our money and now they are going to stiff us. China will not really see much of our money until we actually get our referral(and that's not a whole lot of money then either if you think about it all).

I am back to myself and willing to fight the fight with the rest of my waiting friends. I am ready to encourage my friends again and cheer them on as they get their referrals and bring home their babies. I am ready to give my family 100% again and to savor them like they deserve. I am ready to live my life as is until its time to turn my life upside down. The rewards I am sure will surpass any feelings of "losing out" when I am chasing a little girl who relies on me....even if she does wake me up before 7am.

Vacation 2008

Soooooo with the economy being what it is we will not being going back to Disney World as we thought we would be this fall. We decided to go simple this year and drove to Minnesota to the Mall of America. Why do you ask would a woman take her husband and two boys to the mall???

• It was cheaper than Disney World.



• We could drive there in less than a day.



• They boasted tons of family activities.



• I could shop while they played (wishful thinking on that part).



• We got a heck of a great package!

We left on a Tuesday morning and got there by lunchtime. The boys were great in the car. I was beyond impressed! We got there by lunchtime, ate lunch and checked into our hotel. The boys were impressed by the pool and Dave and I were impressed with the room. After settling in we swam in the pool and then headed over to the mall. We walked around a little and then someone gave us some tickets for the rides. The boys and I rode a roller coaster and the boys were ready for more. We reminded them that we would be spending a day there so not to worry. We had dinner, shopped some more and then went and crashed.

So my package included:

• Our hotel stay.



• All day passes for one day at the amusement park in the mall.



• Admission to the aquarium in the mall.



• Admission and parking to the Minnesota Zoo.



• Tickets to the IMax theatre.



• Admission to the Science Museum.



• Coupons to various restaurants.

There was a catch though. You had to use this all in 3 days. This wasn't a problem at all. We did the aquarium the same day we did the amusement park. It was our "break" from the rides. The theatre was located at the zoo so we did both of those together. The cool thing was that everything but the zoo was indoors so we really only needed one good weather day.

We really had a great time and would consider doing the whole thing again another time. I did not do any real mall damage since Big Brother (ie Dave) was watching everything I picked up. Driving home we did get caught in every storm there was...but we made it safe and sound. The boys are still talking about it so that says a lot. Now to figure out an inexpensive way to spend a few days away from home (and the boys) for our 10Th anniversary!